It is sometimes the case that the issue of infidelity arises when a couple is engaged. Plans for the BIG DAY are in the works, money is spent; the upcoming wedding is a dream come true and it's on it's way. Then, through accident or confession, an infidelity is uncovered. It may be recent or back when you were first dating. It may have been a brief mistake or a prolonged affair. Whatever the case, this discovery is devastating. And the timing is a nightmare.
Engaged & Cheating
There is never a good time to realize that your partner has been unfaithful. But finding out on the way to the wedding is another level of upheaval. You are excited to get married, you've found your person, your love is strong. You know there will be challenges along the way but are comforted knowing that you'd be facing them together, giving each other strength. You expected rough patches but you never expected it would be this. I am deeply sorry if you are going though anything like this. I know how upsetting & crushing it can be.
You are already under stress with the practical details of event planning but now you can't think straight, you don't know what to do. Do you tell people? Will they slam your partner and scorn your marriage if you go through with it? Will your parents hate your partner and make the wedding tense? Should you even get married? Should you forgive? Is this a test? If they cheated once will they do it again? Every possible question passes through your mind. What you want is to feel loved, safe and normal again. You need a place to work things out. Someplace calm, free from distraction. Counseling as a Couple can be that for you.
Infidelity Counseling is a safe, neutral place to work through painful issues
If you find your relationship going through something like this feel free to reach out for some Couples Therapy. Every case is different. Most people do go on to marry and live a happy live together but you will need some professional help navigating through the earthquake of infidelity. I am here to help. Email me with your details and let's see if some sessions with me will be the right next step for you both.
I also have a large dedicated site for PreMarital Counseling
Email is the best way to reach me
I look forward to hearing from you.
Dona Laressa Desmond, PhD
CPC CA LMFT
PreMarital Infidelity Help
$30 discount on Video sessions during COVID if needed